You Have a Beautiful Face

Wednesday, March 10th, 2010 5:27 pm — Stories, Rambles, and Other ThingsNo comments yet

I was mining some old music magazines for interesting things when I spotted this advertisement from 1918.

Nose-Shaper "Trados" (Model 24)

Nose-Shaper "Trados" (Model 24)

A certain M. Trilety, who claimed to be a “Face Specialist,” promised that this uncomfortable looking contraption — the Nose-Shaper “Trados” (Model 24) — would fix “ill-shaped noses” in a safe and discrete way. One would wear this half-helmet while sleeping, hoping (I assume) that this strap-on was not so comfortable that you forgot you were wearing it. Imagine showing up at a place of work or in public with this device clamped to your face.

I thought it was funny, the inventions people come up with to help individuals perform self-mutilation. Another ad, from 1906, promotes Kursheedt’s Hand Expander.

Kursheedt's Hand Expander

Kursheedt's Hand Expander

Allegedly “A Necessity for All Musicians” this contraption’s inventor claimed to have endorsements from “the greatest pianists and teachers” of the day. E. B. Kursheedt promised that students with smaller hands would see technical difficulties and weaknesses disappear with daily use of the Hand Expander. It seems like nonsense to me, and as old as this ad is I think the notion that musicians require larger hands than non-musicians is a myth that may never die. Josef Hoffman had tiny hands that could barely reach an octave while Rachmaninoff’s hands were huge. Liszt, on the other hand (sorry, couldn’t help it), was probably the greatest pianist that ever lived and he had only average-sized hands. Gadgets like the Hand Expander promised to develop strength in muscles via means other than practicing your instrument, and I imagine that the avoidance of the grueling drills of practicing scales might have made this thing attractive to some. It’s funny how the ad promises that the Hand Expander will “enable the student to play exercises that he could not before attempt.” Exercises? Seriously? Not even music but exercises?

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