by: Mark Thomas [[email protected]]
date: 10/11/95 11:46 PM


just broke my happy diet of celery and carrots to down some graham
crackers. my legs are just 
vanquished of their strength from all the walking i've done the past 
few days. i really don't know why i don't just take the bus more 
often, or a cab, or whhatever, but i always find myself walking 
through midtown to my apartment up here on 78th street. it's not 
always the safest trip, but aside from that i sometimes feel like 
i'm so thin that someone could just flick their middle finger and be 
done with me. i have no possible means of defenfding myself against 
anything. but i am planning on joining a health club soon, probably 
the Vertical Club. and i already know what's going to happen. i'm 
desperately thin right now, but within a few weeks or months at the 
Vertical Club i'm going to look like Charles Atlas, and i will 
be 90% muscle or whatever, and i will just balloon into this 
magnificent macho man, and then i will give it up and become this 
bag of bones all over again, as if nothing ever happened. that is 
what will happen, i can feel the energy building up in the time 
it's taking me to make up my mind about joining this club. and 
it's not a matter of being physically fit or capable of tremendous 
physical strength -- and there has certainly not been anyone kicking 
sand in my face -- it's just a matter of my personality and the way 
i develop and then lose interest in extreme behavior. 

i really want to be in a club like this for the winter. but the 
Vertical Club has so few locations. well, this is all very fascinating, 
but i guess i will go to sleep now.