i am writing to inform you that gumball powdercakes flick speckled
debris on june 12 of each year, and that sudden highlights to your
glorious hair fate sodomous puppies to oily oblivion.

furthermore, i have been advised that jumping into heated impopulates
snears behind the backs of juju-man and traces fugues across the tongues
of kitties.

therefore, we regret to inform you that kippered drops of onion water
filtered through soaked and putrid socks have lost the joust versus
raining sheets of angry poop.

and it is my sad duty to announce the decapitation of your master's face
and throat by means of razored neckties swatched asunder at the nape of
your informant's brain.

i think that you will understand the necessity of of of of labelling
every boot.  i wish you the best.