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January 20, 2003
mark thomas I just did something I haven't done in a long time. I answered a ringing pay phone. It was outside a convenience store, and it is a payphone I have walked past and used many times. The phone rang very, very faintly, but I heard it and answered. "Hello." "Hi. Is this a gas station?" a woman asked. She sounded pleasant and very interested in my answer. I said "Well, this is a payphone." "At a gas station?" "Well, it's really outside a convenience store," I explained, "but there's a gas station about a block away. A Getty station." I forgot how tantalizing these first few seconds are after you pick up a ringing payphone. Anything seems possible. This random communion of strangers could produce anything. "I'm trying to reach my daughter. She should be walking by any minute now. Do you see her?" There were several people walking around, and any one person could be coming from one of many different directions. "I can't really tell, there are lots of people out here." "Oh and it's so cold. I hope she gets there soon." "Yeah, it's cold out here." "You see she doesn't have a phone, and I've been trying to reach her. I just thought I'd take a chance and try it. She told me to call this payphone, and she said it's at a gas station." "Yeah, there is a gas station about a block away, that must be what she meant. This is actually right outside a convenience store." "Do you see her coming?" "I'm looking around but I can't really tell." "You see I'm out on the Island, and I hope this is the right number so I don't have to call again. She's a tall girl. She should be coming from under the el." When she said that I turned to the elevated subway and, lo, a tall woman emerged from the shadows and appeared to be walking toward the payphone. "I think I see her," I announced. "Is she a tall girl?" "Yeah, I think so." "Oh, thank you!" She was tall, appeared to be in her mid 40s. She walked, I thought, with a John Wayne sort of amble. Her hair was frizzed and wild, and when she spoke I was surprised that her voice sounded like someone trying to imitate John Wayne. A subway train roared past on the el. I held the phone toward the approaching woman and yelled "It's for you!" She nodded, then casually said "OK, just a second," like this scene was common for her. She went into the convenience store, and I reported to the caller that her daughter would be on the phone in a moment. "Oh, thank you thank you thank you!" She was immensely appreciative. I felt a certain goodness inside me, even if I was unsure how valuable my contribution was, and equally unsure how to interpret this whole situation. It reminded me of the times in 1990 and 1991 when I would call my mother from payphones on the Upper West Side of Manhattan, and she would call me at those payphones. There would be noise and it would be cold and there would be other people waiting to use the phones. The woman came out of the convenience store and I handed her the phone. She yelled "Thank you, hon!" to me. I said "You go it," and as I continued walking home I heard the beginnings of this mother and daughter having their conversation. I know why I answered the phone. For the last few weeks I've gotten to a point where I will talk to just about anybody. Call it loneliness, blame it on the recent full moon, I don't know what it is but I picked this phone up hoping for a real conversation but expecting nothing. Not long ago I gave up using the telephone for communication of any personal substance, but I was pleasantly surprised when the caller tried to keep me on the phone. I was just getting used to talking to her when I had to give up the phone to the person she was really trying to reach. « Long Lines and Lotteries • sorabji.com • Blank Walls and Steak Knives »
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