Mark Thomas ([email protected]) NOVEMBER 30, 1996. 7:13PM Once, in a fish store in Tampa, a friend and I were walking around and we saw a fishtank full of feeder goldfish. A hand-written sign on the tank said "FEEDER GOLDFISH. 10 for $1. NO CHOICE." And I said to my friend "Wouldn't it be funny if we were trying to leave the store and a security guard came up to us and said 'Sorry guys. You saw the sign. It's 10 Feeder Goldfish for a dollar. You got NO CHOICE.' And he'd hand us a bag full of feeder goldfish, and we'd hand him a dollar." My friend didn't get it, and so I had to explain that the sign meant you could get 10 fish for a buck, but you could not pick and choose among them. "See, you have 'No Choice' of which 10 fish you get." At some point while I was explaining it I think he got it, and understood not only what the sign meant but also why the things I had just said were meant to be a joke. Instead of laughing, though, he looked disconcerted and a little constipated in the brain as he tried to think of a witty riposte which reflected not only his understanding of why I was SO GODDAM FUNNY but also his ability to overcome this non-understanding of my tepid humor and trounce it with his own masterful wit. But it didn't happen, and we left the store, unsure where next to take the conversation.

Go Back Inside Nightmare From Jutta, with Loving Boredom Viva! Residue